So, after my first Mommy Post, I got a lot of questions from people in my life about myths they had heard about cosleeping, or some people just wanted to accuse myself and my husband of doing something unsafe. I will say it again, just as there is a safe way for your baby to sleep alone, there is a safe way for your baby to sleep with you! According to the World Heath Organization (WHO), more babies die alone in their cribs than die in the family bed. Some studies have also linked cosleeping to a reduced risk of SIDS! Remember, have guard rails for your bed, never sleep with baby when you are under the influence, and keep fluffy pillows and blankets to a minimum. So, I am going to clear up some things about cosleeping for some of the skeptics out there!
- You are going to roll on your baby and kill him/her – Yes, this does happen VERY RARELY. Again, most of these cases happen when a parent is under the influence of alcohol, drugs, or pain medication, so they should not be sleeping with their babies anyway! Mothers are intrinsicly aware of their babies, even in their sleep, so you will find that you always seem to know where baby is even when you are fast asleep. Some daddies aren’t as aware of the baby in their sleep, so if this is the case, make sure that baby sleeps next to Mommy only. Also, small babies should always sleep next to Mommy only. Also, babies are like little heat seeking missles towards their mommies. They will move closer and closer towards you as they sleep. Sawyer sleeps right in the crook of my arm with one hand on the boob at all times!
- If you let the baby in your bed he/she will never leave! - Yes, your baby may have a more difficult time transitioning into their own bed, but sometimes they don’t. Like everything in the world of parenting, it will take some work and it has to be a gradual change. You can’t go from a family bed to your baby in their own bed in a whole other room in one night. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and your baby isn’t going to take to a whole new sleeping arrangement in one either. With that said, your baby will leave your bed! I have 3 siblings, and we all slept in bed with our parents, and guess what?! None of us do anymore! In fact, no on did after the age of 2 or 3. My brother Dan wanted his own bed at 1! My sister, now 17, had the hardest time with the transition, but my being almost 10 years older than her helped. She moved from my parents’ bed when she was 2 and slept in bed with me on and off till she was 4. The funniest thing is that when Sawyer was first born and we were looking for a house, and thus staying with my Mom and Dad, she would come and sleep in bed with me when Kevin was out! I see that as a sign of our close relationship, however, and not because she still longs for the family bed.
- Cosleeping will ruin my sex life! – Only if you decide that your sex life has to be boring! Dr. Sears agrees with me on this one, as you can read in the “Bedding Close to Baby” section of The Attachment Parenting Book. The bed is not the only place for sex! Dr. Sears says to “start seeing every room of your home as a potential love chamber.” While I think his choice of words there is a little cheesetastic, his point is right on. You can make love to your partner anywhere you choose! Just make sure baby is safely in your bed before doing so. My recommendation is to make a game out of it. See how many rooms in your house you can have a sexy romp in!
With all of this said, I am not saying that cosleeping is “right” and crib sleeping is “wrong.” You need to do what is best for your family and your baby, and that must be a family decision that everyone involved is on board with. So, if you aren’t comfortable with cosleeping, then by all means, don’t do it. Although I have a feeling if you give it a try, you just might like it! , <3
Happy Cosleeping Family on Christmas Morning!
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